Dungeons & Dragons

With APPOTHROMAX defeated and his two thirds of an amulet liberated, Charlie Company returns to Quietreach to pick up Solana, down the hall of doors, and out to the Firepeaks to Brother Im’s monastery of hot vis where they reconvene with Im in a room of indefinite plumbing. Ten offers to relieve Im of his one thirds of an amulet as well as any liability for whatever happens next.

Ten brings the three thirds of the amulet together, and the pieces snap into a reassuringly specific orientation that suggests it could not have been done incorrectly. It happens that the newly formed shape could fit into a junction of three pipes, each isolated by a wheeled valve with one triangle of color pointed along each pipe in any one of three ways, counting only the positions that place the most polished faces up. From exegesis of Opeth’s prophecies, most likely the two source tanks would feed ice and fire vis into the receiving vessel of gold. Orienting the gold point toward the receiving vessel, Ten snaps the amulet into place revealing a brief visual phenomenon. The monks bring in a barrel of fire vis and fill up tank on the red side causing only a slightly menacing groaning of the apparatus. Too bad nobody brought along any ice vis, thinks everyone but Solana. Solana collects the company haversacks acquired through the demise and subsequent reconstitution of the various units that have participated in the Quastarte diaspora since its destruction. She uncorks the embroidered unit badges revealing dimensional holes full of ice vis hiding in plain sight the whole time. The ice vis is poured into the cold tank side of the groaning apparatus.

The mixing valves are slowly opened by those strong enough to do so. All others endure Barika’s chastisement for their weak nerd arms. Ten opens the outlet valve and the receiver satisfyingly fills with lovely golden hybrid vis. The party dips primary weapons into the pool in turns which imbues the weapons with golden energy and the wielders of those weapons with golden protection [100 temporary HP]. Sqyylarr’s attempt to go around again to douse her other favorite weapon is interrupted by Tophe, of Cohoreth the Herald head rolling infamy [Altar of Inle – Dungeons & Dragons (doonbeet.com)], here to whisk them away to the promise of death.

The party finds itself once again [Tophe – Dungeons & Dragons (doonbeet.com)] at a portal onto the largely destroyed prison platform of Tharizdun the Dreaming Madness suspended above the astral sea. Ash taunts Tophe, soliciting some unseen laughter of overconfidence, the best kind of unseen laughter. It is safe, with mental concentration, to leap across gaps in platform debris, but unlike the previous visit there are now invisible walls ominously channeling their progress. Ten casts a spell to see invisibility and guides the leaping party through the narrow openings.

A swarm of tiny mechanical spiders climbs Ander while a second swarm waits its turn. Watc heats them up with a firebolt and Ander fatally pops their supercaps with a shocking grasp. Sqyylarr and Barika smash the waiting swarm before it can get started. A more organic giant spider, relation unknown, emerges from hiding to bite Barika, but it fortunately mistimes its delivery of poison. Ten collects a death toll and Barika collects a death.

Sqyylarr follows Ten’s guidance east by north and encounters a hovering octopus, an unexpected foe even in this mad setting. Sqyylarr whacks the octopus’s spider companion first and cleaves through to the octopus. Ander tries to knock it back over the edge of the debris fragment with a ballista bolt, but it just hovers stubbornly. Watc firebolts it dead, but now it has two more octofriends approaching. The second falls victim to Sqyylarr’s slang, Barika’s javelins, and Ander’s firebolt and ballista combo. The third, hovering out of reach over the astral sea below, is stuck repeatedly by Ash’s vicious longbow slayer’s prey sneak attacks until it can no longer afford Ten’s death toll.

The rapid destruction of his eight-legged army of things really cheeses Tophe who is roaring as though personally injured. Next up on the path is Tophe’s wastrilith protector. It shakes off an attempted immolation by Watc and some hucked javelins by Barika. The close invisible walls create an unfortunate party clump, ripe for the protector’s fireball. Ander’s flash of genius and Sqyylarr’s indomitability mitigate the fireball’s damage. Ander rebuts with a treatment of scorching rays and a pushing ballista bolt. Ash joins that effort with a pushing arrow attack that shoves the protector into an invisible wall rather than over the edge. Sqyylarr slangs a fatal bullet that uncoils the snaky protector and makes Tophe howl in pain.

The only way forward takes the party over an obstacle. Ash leapingly assaults the wall and finds a waiting cyclops. Ten opens a circle of power to help defend against magical effects. Barika and Sqyylarr go to work on the cyclops martially. Ander’s screwdriver propels catapulted debris, but the magical exertion attracts the freakishly fast cyclops who slams into Ander’s face reactively. Ash wounds the cyclops viciously. Barika critically destroys the cyclops with a heavy greataxe blow.

At this point, Tophe indicates he has had enough and escalates an astral dreadnought into the party’s path. The dreadnought takes some readied firebolts and thrown projectiles before showing Barika how it’s done, biting and clawing away her entire golden bubble of protection [99 damage]. Ander hastens Sqyylarr and ballistas the dreadnought back a step to create some space. Ash critically sprays slayer arrows into the dreadnought, goading it. Ten brings up his aura to Barika and Sqyylarr engaging the dreadnought. Sqyylarr slays the dreadnought with her slammoth.

It looks like Tophe will actually have to fight this one personally, though he looks vicariously more injured than at their first meeting today. Ander empties a wand of magic missiles into Tophe until the wand disintegrates from overexertion. Ander’s ballista knocks Tophe back, but not out of range of arrows, javelins, bullets, and Ten’s spiritual weapon. Tophe drops a cloudkill on the clumped party which Ten’s aura nullifies infuriatingly. Tophe retreats toward Tharizdun’s prison. Ander hurriedly lays a wall of fire between Tophe and Tharizdun, letting go of Sqyylarr’s haste and putting her into detox for a moment. Under pressure from Barika, Tophe produces a bone staff to beat on her, but she has him pinned against the burning wall. Ten’s spiritual weapon righteously beats on Tophe’s outsides while Watc’s magic immolates his insides, and the fire wall cooks his backsides. Ander’s scorching rays pierce Tophe. Ash’s sneaky arrows launch him into the wall of fire where his mortal remains are incinerated.

The party spends an hour tending to Barika and discussing how to disable Tharizdun’s influence on the world, conducted through the Pohet crystal jammed into the side of his prison bubble [Tharizdun and The Dreaming Madness – Dungeons & Dragons (doonbeet.com)]. The crystal needs to be removed without compromising the integrity of the bubble. Ander has a little chat with the crystal, informing it that Tophe was easily defeated. His desired effect, that the intimidated Pohet crystal would simply surrender its position willingly, is replaced instead by a shocking grasp that knocks Ander back. Plan B is to remove the crystal by force but not violence. Ander applies his multitool, in the form of a monkey wrench, and begins easing the crystal out of place. Because the multitool was bathed in the golden vis, the puncture closes around the extraction nicely until the crystal is completely freed from the bubble and shatters on the ground. Pohet is no more, and the prison bubble noticeably gains strength.

Ander wipes his hands on his pants and calls it a week.

After a well concealed night’s rest, Barika opens the door out of the hidden passage and carefully investigates a footbridge over a chasm to the north. There are no traps in the conventional sense, but the trap of aging bridge infrastructure collapses beneath her. She arrests her plummet with a desperate fingerhold long enough for Watc to mizzium apparatus some flying lessons for her. Ten night steps the broken bridge. Ander, Ash, Sqyylarr, and Watc make more pedestrian running leaps over the rotting bridge. As soon as Watc clears the span, the door closes behind her and pompous dragon laughter fills the snow and ice packed cave that stretches out of sight to the north. The booming dragon voice bids them an insincere welcome as elite skeletons and skeletal mammoths spring out of the icy hills around Barika.

Watc opens with a fireball because that never goes wrong. The wrong going fireball melts free several more elite skeletons and another mammoth. Ten summons a gigantic dwarven ghost shadow spiritual guardian who bottlenecks the cavern creating a haven for the convalescent and the squishy. Ander summons a bag of flour and catapults it past a mammoth and into a less dexterous elite skeleton. The unfloured mammoth is hit with a follow-on force ballista knocking it into the same elite skeleton in a puff of flour. The angry mammoth charges Ander, goring and knocking him down before stomping him bloody. Ash controls the other mammoth with some sneaking, goading, vicious arrows. Surrounded Barika gets smacked from the obscuring snowy cloud above by an ancient white tail, undoubtedly attached to APPOTHROMAX at the other end. Sqyylarr slammoths the goaded mammoth and draws plenty of greatsword and longbow action from the surrounding elite skeletons. Watc doubles down on a second fireball which fortunately removes more opposition than it activates this time. Ten channels Ilmater’s twilight sanctuary to buff the righteous and Ilmater’s spiritual weapon to beat the wicked, taking out the skeletal mammoth standing on Ander. Ander regains his feet and brushes off mammoth remains. The party cleans up the remaining elite skeletons and braces for the main event.

The ancient white dragon APPOTHROMAX descends from his lair’s ice storm cloud long enough to frighten everyone, even normally indomitable Sqyylarr. Ten’s aura cures that problem within a few seconds, but the dragon strategerally withdraws back into vertical hiding. Still-flying Barika ascends to take greataxe pain back to the dragon source, but APPOTHROMAX returns the martial damage by way of bites and claws. Ander featherfalls unconscious Barika out of the cloud and tag teams in an air elemental to trade diversionary hits. Ten, with a healing word, drags Barika back to relative safety behind the guardian.

Ten makes a proverbial, and literal, stab at the center of the maelstrom with a moonbeam that lights unseen APPOTHROMAX up. APPOTHROMAX soars to a mathematically appropriate altitude to cold cone the party below, breaking most of the party’s arcane concentration. Already precarious Barika is down and freezing into the ice. Ten is spared by Ander’s flash of genius. Ten masses a cure wounds. Fortunately, the breath weapon also dissipates the obscuring weather. Ander catapults jagged ice bullets and ballista bolts. Ash sims arrows specially dipped in wyvern poison he saved for just such an occasion. Sqyylarr and shaky Barika attack from range, making use of available cover to discourage further breath attacks. Watc manages an immolation which is blunted by APPOTHROMAX’s legendary desire. Unable to close the deal to kill Barika, APPOTHROMAX has a go at Ander. Ander’s right-handed arcane shield intervenes, and he shockingly grasps an escape. Ten positions his aura to cover Ander. Ash aims his last poisoned arrow and cuts APPOTHROMAX down.

Improving weather and a loud cracking to the north suggest that APPOTHROMAX’s demise has some immediately positive effect. While Ander and Barika harvest dragon bits for later crafting, perceptive Ash explores the lair to the north and locates a secret door. Beyond the door is a keening amulet of the two sought triangles of blue and gold.

Ash rotates out to mind the liberated githyanki pirate ship. Ten rotates in for landing party clerical duty.

Watc and Sqyylarr investigate the demised elite skeletons and the alcove they fought so terminally to protect. One skelly is dispossessed of his fancy half plate armor [+2] which Ander stuffs into extradimensional storage for later cleaning and tuning. There is nothing special about the alcove other than it is slightly less miserable than the rest of the snowy, blowing, icy cave.

Eager Barika scrambles forward to the large ice cavern ahead where she finds less blowing snow but more ice crystals that sprout from the floor, the walls, and, if it were not too high to observe well, the ceiling.

Ten avails himself of the dimness to night step over the slippery floor, floating past Barika to a heavy, icy table set into one side of the cavern. Frozen in chains converging from the corners across frozen blood tell a tale of torture. Conspicuously placed gold coins in the center of the table tell a tale of entrapment. When Ten’s deputized mage hand helps himself to the loot, a mousetrap section of the table smashes over, instantly killing no one. Ten finds the “loot” is gold-painted lead.

Sqyylarr notices the cavern’s ice crystals, at least the ones stuck to the floor, contain people. Icy dead people, as she notes.

Barika examines a chest to the north of the table and cautiously removes crampons to distribute to the party for better hallway traction on the icy floors.

Ten checks out some cages and bones scattered around the sides of the torture nook. The bones appear dragonoid. Pithy Sqyylarr hopes they were not APPOTHROMAX, the mention of whom brings a roll of booming laughter that ominously fills the cavern. Watc, following the source of the mirth, finds a frozen waterfall on the south wall above which is yet more open than the already vaulted ceiling. Watc shouts up the waterfall for APPOTHROMAX, but the only response is a white dragon who bursts unwelcomingly from frozen storage in the southeast wall.

Watc ignites an immolation of Johnawd the white dragon. Johnawd frightens the party save Sqyylarr and Ten. Ten counters with a twilight sanctuary that removes fear and temporarily boosts their fortitude instead. He interposes a spiritual weapon and spits an ice cube defiantly at Johnawd. Ander-hastened, stone-slinging Sqyylarr charges just as Johnawd flaps up out of reach following a devastatingly critical bite on her.

Ander vortex warps Sqyylarr back between Watc and Ten and knocks Johnawd back with a ballista bolt. Ten uber heals Sqyylarr’s ouchies and wallops Johnawd with the spiritual weapon. Watc activates her mizzium apparatus, aided by Ander’s flash of genius, to give Sqyylarr flying lessons. Sqyylarr launches with the greatest of ease and triple frost giant daggers Johnawd. Supported by a barrage of bolts and spirituality, Sqyylarr endures Johnawd’s onslaught of bites and clawing and frost giant stabs him dead.

Sqyylarr, still raging on haste, considers flying up the waterfall to solo APPOTHROMAX, but a short rest seems more prudent.

Exploration resumes an uneventful hour later with a barracks room through a decorative rib cage to the north. Ander ponders where the occupants went, but the crunching of the ice-lodged bits, bobs, and bones of former people underfoot noisily answers that question. Barika leads the party into the crunchy hallway tunnel going west and gets got by a roper hiding on the ceiling. She chops at it with a disadvantaged hand axe. Despite that and a barrage of bolts, bullets, death tolls, and an ixin of scorching rays from her support group, reeled-in Barika gets munched in the face. The greedy roper snags up Sqyylarr for dessert. Ander featherfalls Barika and Sqyylarr comfortably down when the roper expires, unable to afford Ten’s death toll.

Ten cannot emphasize enough the importance of searching for more ropers down the hallway tunnel. Watc abides but poorly as a tendril grabs her up. The joke is on the roper as Watc misty steps away, replaced by a bullet slung by Sqyylarr. The joke is on Watc as the tendril is longer than misty step and the roper grabs her into a bite. Misfortunate Barika gets picked up again as well. Barika tries to use her more powerful greataxe this time, but the confinement is too awkward to wield such a large weapon and she makes a devastating error that results in more of her face bitten off. Watc misty steps away again and adds in some conventional running to escape tendril range, throwing back a firebolt in exchange. Again, it is Ten’s death toll that overdraws the roper, and again Ander’s featherfall gives Barika a gentle return to the ice bone floor.

The hallway tunnel ends in a ladder descending from above. Ten finds no danger lurking at the top of the ladder. Another short rest therefore ensues.

The descending ladder ascends into darkness. Ander ungloves a blue gem of brightness embedded into his constructed hand. The light reveals a smooth, branching tunnel which darkvisioned Ten is already exploring. Ten finds a glowing magmin clinging to the tunnel wall. Ten sets about ingratiating the party to the magmin occupants by getting Ander to light a small fire, not that Ander needs much convincing when it comes to fire. The magmin retreats. Ten envelopes the area with a beacon of hope imbuing the nearby magmin and party with mutual hope and vitality. Ten stows his weapons and Sqyylarr, now sporting a prestidigitated helm of flame, uncharacteristically does the same. Ander prestidigitates a flaming, yet soothingly unanatomical, heart. The chaotic magmin accept these gestures and withdraw.

The party filters south through the tunnels, organically formed by hot magmin moving through the ice, it seems. The magmin kumbaya is interrupted when a remorhaz pops out of the floor at Sqyylarr. Unbeknownst to Ander and Watc, their alternating firebolts and frosty rays are useless against the immune remorhaz. Even Sqyylarr’s frosty giant dagger is less effective. Ten gets some traction with death tolls, but he is also focused on keeping Sqyylarr in the pink with the single greatest uber heal of all time when the remorhaz bites and swallows Sqyylarr. Fortunately for Sqyylarr, her Ander-crafted armor lends immunity against the remohaz’s digestive acid and she lingers comfortably within. Ten shields her in faith while Ander’s ballista finally wears the remorhaz out. Sqyylarr emerges, dripping with gall juice but otherwise alive and well.

The ice tunnels reveal no other perils, so the party continues south. Perceptive Ten notices a whistling wind from a crack where the tunnels would otherwise simply end, unrewardingly forcing a time-consuming backtrack through the dungeon. An icy rock rolls aside revealing a short and narrow ice passage that dead ends in compacted gravel concealing a door. It seems like the perfect hiding hole to safely rest for the night.

Ash guides Ander as he mind-controls the Batship Crazy along, ever toward APPOTHROMAX. The astral gem gets brighter. A conspicuous absence of further attacks suggests that Ash’s guidance is on fleek until a githyanki pirate ship pokes into their bubble ahead. Watc and Ander explode fireballs across the pirate deck while Sqyylarr and Ash man the ballistas. Barika settles for nothing less than a cannon as Ander turns to put the pirates into broadside. The flaming pirate ship, relieved of all its crew save the helmsman, attempts to grapple onto the Batship Crazy despite Ander’s offer to accept his surrender. Barika blasts the unheeding flaming pirate ship into flaming splinters and it falls away to the astral sea.

A cold vista opens off the port side as the ship’s bubble smooshes into the bubble of an icy land mass below. The piercing cold threatens to kill the party if they don’t find a way to survive, other than Barika who was raised by wolves in the cold Spine of the World mountain range; she is comfortable for the first time since leaving home. Ander fortuitously locates a chest full of winter weather gear in the hold of the Batship Crazy and distributes it to the others. Watc pops the astral gem out of the astral throne so that joyriding pirates may not abscond with the ship. Charlie Company, drained from the journey, rests up for the day ahead.

Sqyylarr pilots the landing party down to the edge of a frozen lake in the captured Githyanki ship and lands at the only visible landmark of any interest, a frozen river mouth that wends into a cave. Blowing snow obscures the senses and slows progress. The party disembarks and begins the trek toward the cave mouth. Snow drifts along the cliff-faced edges of the path conceal mammoth skeletons that pop out and attempt to stomp them. Sqyylarr discovers an extreme talent for obliterating mammoth skeletons with triple-crushing Smash. Slashing Barika must work a lot harder at it, but still gets a fair bit of damage in. Ander and Watc conserve their efforts by phoning in some firebolts while Sqyylarr gleefully litters the icy ground with spinning bone splinters.

Sqyylarr loots a frost giant dagger from a pouch worn by one of the fallen mammoths. [+1 bonus to attack and damage rolls made with this magic weapon. On a hit, +1d8 cold damage. Huge-sized weapon, wieldable by medium creature as a heavy, two-handed martial weapon that deals 3d4 piercing damage.] Up ahead, the icy, rocky ceiling caves in on Watc.

Ash scouts ahead and decides on a right fork in the path toward a second cave mouth. A quad squad of elite skeletons amble around at the transition. The two parties share the space peacefully for a few moments. Barika approaches to greet them and then steps aways as a ruse to learn whether they will opportunistically greatsword her in the back. They do. She greataxes them in the front. Watc fireballs the skeletons, softening the targets for Ash’s prey slaying, Sqyylarr’s frost daggering, Ander’s ray scorching, and Barika’s great axing.

Ten and Ash take the commandeered githyanki airship for a joyride leaving Ander and crew to pilot the Batship Crazy, navigating by thoughts of APPOTHROMAX. Watc’s arcane analysis of the ship’s engine reveals a knob that can be turnt to some effect. Sqyylarr’s prodigious survival instincts steer the mission away from a couple of perilous encounters. Barika improvises a delightful little APPOTHROMAX sea ditty to encourage Ander’s steerage.

A few dragon wyrmlings appear at the edge of the ship’s astral bubble. Ander steers the ship’s propeller right into a smallish black dragon wyrmling and puts the ship into a swatting barrel roll. Poop deck ballistas under the command of Sqyylarr and Barika open on the poison spitting green dragon wyrmling. Watc immolates a second black dragon wyrmling who boards to bite on Ander and immolates a lightning-breathing blue dragon wyrmling already suffering ballista punctures.

The wyrmling corpses are not yet removed when a double thud announces the arrival of a troll and his ettercap buddy. Fireballs from Watc and Ander end the ettercap before it gets going. Sqyylarr and Barika ensure the troll also perishes where he landed.

An avenging dire troll thuds down on deck moments later and meets Sqyylarr and Barika’s brutality with a whirlwind claw attack before it is immolated by Watc, firewalled by Ander, and axed to death by Barika.

After a short rest, Barika takes a turn at the helm and steers the ship right into another dire troll who lands on the poop deck. Sqyylarr smashes the dire troll from the ladder before Ander vortex warps it onto the side of the ship where it plummets into the astral sea. A follow-up dragon wyrmling is ended with some ballistas and scorching rays. Hopefully that was not APPOTHROMAX.

The Quietreach shipyards have completed the assembly and installation of the astral throne, comprising the dragon compass liberated from Phlouwurz, the astral gem liberated from Ulrozax, and the ship’s helm astral throne proper liberated from the sunken Dusty Reaver claimed by STEVE, into the helm of the Eberron airship, liberated from the temple ground station of the City of Shade. Ander salivates audibly.

Xalver addresses Charlie Company at the dedication of the Batship Crazy and reminds them that the three parts of the Opeth vision now in play are:

1: The inverted triangle vision displayed in three colors: ice blue in the upper right, fiery red in the upper left, golden yellow at the bottom. Those colors stream from the corners.

2: Tophe the headroller does battle with some unfortunate company of adventurers equipped with weapons represented by the golden portion of the triangle.

3: The triangle moves closer to the vision observer. The blue and gold corners break from the red corner, herald the dragon APPOTHROMAX, and vanish.

Here with an update on the vision is Brother Im. Adherents of Quastarte, and its successor Quietreach, are already acquainted with the ice vis; indeed, it is no exaggeration to say Quastarte coalesced around ice vis in the way that ice vis coalesces around cold ley lines of magic. Similarly, Brother Im’s lapin organization fulfills the stewardship for a complementing fire vis which coalesces around hot lava ley lines of magic. And it is no coincidence that blue and red make up two corners of the vision triangle as demonstrated literally and symbolically when Im dramatically produces a literal red triangle corner from his tunic. Im does not anticipate existence of a third golden vis but does anticipate the end goal is a device that combines ice vis and fire vis into something even more powerful.

This mission, then, is to jump the astral-throned airship Batship Crazy into the astral plane, locate the dragon APPOTHROMAX, and liberate his portion of the vis mixing triangle thing. Questions?

Ander wonders how the astral throne operates exactly. Exactly? Well, they have a really good guess . . . a pretty good guess at least . . . well, you’ll work it out. And how many crew are assigned to the mission? Technomancy Regent Solana candidly admits that any crew helpful enough to participate are inherently too valuable to risk. But Solana herself is available, subject to sufficiently discouraging terms and conditions.

Watc wonders whether APPOTHROMAX is possibly amenable to cooperation in this endeavor. Xalver is curious about that himself.

Ash wonders if any provision has been made for anti-dragon equipment should a dragon fight become necessary, but rampant supply chain issues along the Sword Coast and the ensuing inflation have made provisioning a challenge.

Once the party has boarded and explored the airship, Martial Regent Hidhall Aacis offers a class on operation of the 12-pounder cannons lining the lower deck. All information and instruction conveyed, the shore party disembarks.

Artificer Ander assumes helm position, grasps the wheel, tickles the dragon compass, and intuitively harnesses the power of thought: GO! A blinding, swirling, disorienting, freezing environment engulfs the airship. Several of the party lose consciousness including pilot Ander. Sqyylarr awakens Ander and directs his attention to the silver lining that forms a tight bubble of normalcy around the airship. Ash, recalling a previous Tophe-driven experience in the astral plane to meet imprisoned Tharizdun, glides himself astrally by the power of thought [optional movement of 3*INT] to Watc and clanks her awake on the cheeks. Watc leans over the gunwale to look for landmarks below, but it’s all bubble lining. Taco-Cat licks Barika awake below deck. Ander wakes Ten and they review the after-action to fine tune Ander’s operation of the helm.

While Ander makes small, slow, experimental turns, a githyanki pirate ship drifts intrusively into their bubble and fires upon them with forward cannons. Reacting to the unprovoked smashing of their freshly restored and painted airship, Sqyylarr, Barika, and Watc drop into the starboard cannon battery to return fire while Ander pulls into a port spin to place the gith ship into broadsides. The maneuver might be unnecessary as Ash glides out to the tip of the prow, double crits a githyanki pirate overboard, and threatens to capsize their entire ship. Ten faerie fires the pirates just in time to advantage their salvo of cannon fire that clears the pirate deck as it slowly enters the bubble. The unfortunate last surviving githyanki pirate ignores Ander’s demand for surrender, eats a couple of 12-pound cannon balls, fires back from his own cannon, and is knocked overboard by Ash’s sneaky slayer spray.

Ander slips alongside the adrift pirate ship. Ten leaps over and claims maritime finders-keepers instantly doubling the size of their fleet.

Alpha Company wakes at Norder’s Floor & Breakfast. Breakfast consists of buttered coffee, buttered tea, and buttered butter. The party feels unenslaved, fed, and rested for the hike north by northeast where Norder suggests they will find an owlbear den. Ssatschia, who sacrificed his evening to provide security for the party, crashes in Norder’s personal chair.

The path forces the party further east than optimal into a bright and sunny clearing that barely covers the rock formation forming hills to the east. In fact, it is difficult to walk through the clearing without stepping on the rocks as Moth does, inciting several gricks to pop out and tentacle slap the party. The gricks are unable to land any beak strikes. Nala and Moth control the grick faces while Tango sneaks lethally around their flanks. Scram grasps shockingly out of melee range to carefully firebolt without igniting the forest. Snory collects death tolls and transfers the balance to Tango. Nala runs down the fleeing last grick who dies tired.

Continuing north, the party enters a burnt-out forest. Scram looks around guiltily but realizes they have not previously visited this area. Snory reckons the blanket of smoky fog is at least in part an ancient unseelie fey curse, but also contributed by the fire elemental emerging from the foul haze to kill them. Scram rationalizes that fire won’t be extinguished by more fire and switches to witch bolt. Fire or not, Nala solves all problems with the greatsword. Snory has advanced right on top of a fire spirit and gets his legs ignited. He returns bad touch for bad touch and inflicts necrotic wounds back to the spirit. Tango and Moth rake through with short swords but get touched by a considerably larger fire elemental. Scram tosses in a vitriolic sphere that cooks off the smaller spirits and does no favors for the large elemental. Tango sneaks in for the offhand kill.

Continuing north, the party follows the whimsical sound of a flute to an impossibly blue pond concealed in an overgrown thicket. Qed, the smirky half man, half goat, half flutist, seems pleased when master emulator Scram joins him in the song’s chorus. Tango wonders if maybe Qed could direct them to the owlbear den they heard so much about recently? Sure, he could do that, but first a number! Tango produces a bell and tickles the clapper in a thrilling bell solo. Whatever Scram hears he plays back in a polyphonic round. Moth hikes up his jerkin and reveals a latent and hairy talent for belly dancing. Nala digs out a couple of pitons and improvises some washboard percussing on her armored washboard abs. Snory generously moistens his hand and makes rude flapping armpit noises. Qed, inexplicably pleased by this display, allows a short rest in his glen but with a solemn warning not to drink the water. Nala wonders what’s up with the water situation, and Qed explains that the pond is a gateway to his fey kingdom. Qed directs the party ¾ miles north by north by northeast if it’s owlbears they seek.

Continuing north, the party finds a crumbled altar of ancient elven use seemingly destroyed and displaced in conflict with the fey. Moth climbs what remains of the dais. An elvish specter welcomes Moth and inquires what brings him to this sacred ground? The specter knows exactly where to find some owlbears but would appreciate the kindness of some prayer offerings first. Snory relates a catchy little generic Kelemvoric prayer suitable for any occasion that seems to satisfy the specter. It unsurprisingly directs them north.

Continuing north, the party pushes into a clearing only a few yards from a cave entrance. Snory pokes his head in and greets the nearest owlbear to estimate whether the owlbear, as a species, will be intelligent enough to reason with. The ill-tempered and aggressive owlbear appears ready, willing, and able to remove Snory’s guts for him. Moth intercedes and attempts to sooth the beast with his knowledge of handling animals. Scram evokes a mizziumed halo of Melf’s minute meteors, and Nala gets ready to evade any attacks from those giant claws. The owlbear is having none of this and moves aggressively at Moth while his owlbear family moves out of the way. Death warded Tango takes the lead brandishing his chaos bolt ring which, as it turns out, empowers him speak with the owlbears instead. Two of them settle down when they realize that unarmed Tango grocks the owlbear scene, and those two talk down the big daddy owlbear from removing Moth’s face.

The owlbear family agrees to relocate to a life of relative luxury in the well-meaning hands of Witnesses of the Worm.

At the end of a long unit cohesion weekend at the Primal Tower in the southeast of Quietreach under the team building guidance of ranger Falenas Norfaren, the other hunting boot drops with a foreboding question from Falenas: so … does anyone know much about owlbears?

Falenas can’t contribute much to answer his own question, but he does know that Quietreach researchers Witnesses of the Worm are keen to get a specimen of the cross-species par excellence, dead or alive. The alive ones can be found in the densely dangerous Southern Lluirwood south of the Toadsquar Mountains. The trick of finding things in the Lluirwood is to perish as close to the dangerous center as possible, the perfect task for talented yet expendable Alpha Company.

After a half day march along a decent road from the Hall of Doors gate on the western edge of the Lluirwood, Alpha is waved down by a pair of misfortunate “traders” and their overturned “wagon”. Ssatschia inquires after the overturned “horses”, nowhere in evidence. “Total-not-thugs” Myron and Roald assure Ssatschia that there “definitely” were some horses, and they ran off. Moth makes a recon of the wagon by unloading a “crate”. Tango, alerted by Nala, steps into the trees off the path to “look for horse tracks” and predictably finds bandits waiting in ambush. Tango shouts a “warning” to Myron and Roald. Ssatschia, studying their reaction to this news, gives the universal thumbs down and battle erupts with thuggish heavy crossbows snapping all around.

Henchthugs emerge from both sides of the path. Nala blocks the northern thugs allowing Tango to sneak in devastatingly behind them. Ssatschia takes a sun blade to the southern thugs. Moth flurries punches into Myron’s deceptive face. Nala turns on Roald. Scram, carefully not burning down the forest, scorches rays with lethal precision. A heavy crossbow bolt, sender unknown, sprouts from Scram’s chest. Nala crosses the road to paste Snory’s assailant after Snory tells on him. Moth completes a critical fatal speedbag finishing move on Myron. The sudden surrender of a concealed thug, firing through a knothole in the bottom of the overturned wagon, makes Ssatschia and Moth jump a little.

Tango relieves the thug of his weapons and his 52 silvers while Nala flanks intimidatingly. Snory leverages the zone of intimidation to learn that the thug is the last survivor of Sam Tannerson’s Traveling Mercenary Crew. Sam actual and the next half dozen in his chain of command perished when the Crew was beset along the southern path by a large and fierce forest predator what goes, Hoorawr! Hoorawr! Scram, gathering personal effects of the other thugs, stops to emulate, Hoorawr! Hoorawr! Their decapitated organizational chart left green Myron in charge of the ambush featuring a conveniently abandoned wagon. The thug survivor is unable or unwilling to draw a map back to dead Sam, has no vocation other than thuggery, and would just as soon not be owlbear bait. He is released on his own recognizance.

While Moth bandages Myron’s legacy of scimitar wounds, rogue Tango searches the wagon for secret compartments and finds just that. There definitely was not a stash of coin [54 gp] before Tango got there, but also there is a magical looking ring [of animal influence: 3 charges of animal friendship, fear, or speak with animals]. Scram makes the universal gesture of grabby hands and excuses himself a safe distance to mizzium apparatus identify the ring. The apparatus belches a chaos bolt into Scram’s face. Tango is thrilled with his new chaos bolt ring.

Survivalist Ssatschia leads the party along the path’s southeastern fork, but the cruel forest twists their progress into a great circle. They find themselves back at the wagon by way of the northeastern fork now occupied by a pair of centaurs. Attempts at unrequited diplomacy are made by Moth, hindered by Scram’s capacity to emulate the centaur’s words without understanding the screeched phrase, Die, fiends! A centaur longbow arrow finds the same hole made by the thuggish heavy crossbow bolt in Scram earlier that morning. Most painful. The other centaur takes aim at Tango who charges into the arrow and slings himself around the centaur’s neck, flattening out onto his back and provocatively yelling, Yeehaw! Nala and Snory each inflict wounds on the unmounted centaur touched by death. Ssatschia and Moth inflict wounds on Tango’s centaur. The centaur gets to bucking and piking. Tango produces a kukri and methodically severs the centaur’s windpipe. Tango rolls off the collapsing beast and cleans the blade on its pelt. Whoa there.

Benefitting from the first attempt orienteering the Lluirwood, the party makes a second go of the southeastern fork and this time locates an obscure goat path that does not turn back west. A copse of taller and denser trees signals success, if getting deeper into the woods is one’s idea of success. The orc whom Nala quickly finds and slays would disagree and does so very loudly as his final act. Orcs pour out of the surrounding forest and charge aggressively into the party but are quickly and safely defeated. Ssatschia cures the wounds of Scram who thanks him with a hearty and well-intended, Die, fiends!

The lowering sun, already ineffectively lighting the dense and perilous forest floor, bodes ill. Following the faint sound of running water, the party has the greatest fortune to find a cozy cabin in a cozy clearing with an inviting lamp on the porch. Tango peeps in a window. A halfling reads a book. Tango knocks pleasantly on the door. Friendly owner / occupant Norder answers pleasantly. Tango explains they have been wrecking thugs, centaurs, and orcs all day long and would super appreciate respite in this fine cabin, even if it costs real gold.

Norder invites everyone in for honey tea, honey wine, honey corncakes, and honey elk meats. Norder passes all scrutiny and seems to be exactly as represented. Even so, the plentiful food, libations, conversation, and perfectly suited shelter are way too good to be true. Self-reliant Ssatschia, declining the ridiculously convenient hospitality, elects to patrol around the cabin instead.

Andrakis returns to Quietreach from his approved time off, well-spent kindling a new romantic endeavor, and locates Tambourine in a briefing by Ferin Blackleaf made even briefer by the need to catch up the rest of Delta Company already on its way to the Thunderpeak Labyrinth.

Half a day ahead and deep into the labyrinth, Tanagra, Ivor, and Max look around an old, abandoned, chilled village. The air is notably quiet and festooned with a foreboding, yellow, glittering effect. Max realizes that Gamble has become separated from the party and reluctantly lights a torch in the dimness. Tanagra digs into the company haversack to retrieve the speaking stone to check for missed messages. Rodolf’s voice comes through 5×5 and assures Tanagra that Gamble is fine, just fell asleep in the middle of a life-threatening mission is all.

A few wights in the area provide Tanagra the opportunity to prove out her new Ivor-built greatsword. The wights are not too fierce in battle and allow time for Tambourine and Andrakis to retrace the path of destruction through recent battles with bugs and oozes and catch up to the party, just completing a look at a perilous second floor above the wight room.

Tanagra leads the reformed Delta Company through a connecting tunnel where Andrakis spots a random minotaur up ahead. Max tosses his torch ahead for the benefit of those less sighted and sacreds his longsword. Axe-hucking Tanagra charges the minotaur who is attempting to gore her, and they clash in the middle, shattering the newly field-forged Ivor greatsword. Tanagra files for warranty against manufacturer defect but Ivor asserts user error. Tambourine uses the time to critically morningstar the minotaur and Ivor’s spear drops it.

The next chap starts with a narrow cave. Tanagra immediately spots a trip wire protecting a dead end to the north. Max convincingly halts all progress to work out exactly just what is so important about this dead end that it justifies such an elaborate net trap. An intensive search reveals nothing at all. After the party is clear, mischievous Tambourine triggers the falling, crushing net. Nobody comes around to clear the trap. Max concedes reluctantly that sometimes a trap is just a trap.

The south passage turns east to an 8’ cliff wall. The cavern opens up to the north where a pair of rust monsters drop from the ceiling in flank around Ivor and eat the business end off his spear. Fortunately the butt of Ivor’s spear is also open for business. The party sets up around the rust monsters just as a minotaur launches from the clifftop over Tanagara and pins her in. Tambourine keeps pressure on the rust monsters and Ivor drops some critical wound inflictions to take them out.

The rusty death screeches of the rust monsters elicits a huge roar from the darkness and a challenger appears: the labyrinth keeper. A firebolt wizzes by Ivor’s ear. Ivor charges the keeper and an infliction of wounds bubbles off his shield.

Max-blessed Andrakis, Tambourine, and Tanagra beat down the non-keeping minotaur. Weapon-poor Tanagra liberates its greataxe and meets up for a cure wounds from Ivor who has unpinned the keeper from its corner hovel. Andrakis chucks his shadow blade impressively at the keeper while Ivor focuses his butt on it. Tanagra pastes the keeper with her looted greataxe and then pastes a rust monster add with the backswing.

The cave falls silent. Andrakis has a rest. Ivor scrambles over rubble to explore around the back passages. Tambourine and Tanagra alternate yanks to pull open the poorly concealed, yet firmly lodged, secret door guarded by the late, former keeper. Max takes hold of Tanagra’s hair and adds his own weight to the endeavor and the door eventually yields the keeper’s treasure room, a hoard of gold [1,500 gp], some gems [3 @ 250 gp ea], and the sought-after staff of labyrinthine recall.

Delta Company takes it easy at their lavish Inn Decision digs until Ferin Blackleaf finds them. If they have time to lean, they have time to navigate a perilous minotaur-infested labyrinth to locate a long-abandoned Gnomish Intelligence colleague who undoubtedly perished mapping the maze despite his expertise and a magical mapping staff. Good luck bye.

Through the Hall of Doors into the Thunderpeak mountains to the south, Tanagra, duly nominated and elected navigator, leads Delta overland to the mission entrance, not so much a labyrinth as a network of natural caverns interconnected by mining.

Tanagra leads the party into the first chap.

Despite the foul stench of piles and piles of bones as far as the unilluminated eye can see, navigator Tanagra is not impeached. The bones are examined for their previous owners, perhaps some kind of mammoth and at least one minotaur. None of them seem to have left behind any treasures or magic staves, but a few did leave a legacy of feasting bug swarms who vigorously defend their protein.

Max’s sacred weapon bathes a black pudding in light. The black pudding bathes Tanagra’s greatsword in degrading acid down to the hilt. The regrettably slashy party eventually accidentally slays the pudding, primarily from death tolls collected by Ivor and Gamble in between their deific mendings necessitated by the party’s corroding armor.

A short rest gives Tanagra and Max some time to repair wounds and Ivor time to field-forge Tanagra’s greatsword into like-new condition. A hilt-up greatsword restoration is not an inexpensive proposition. Tanagra and Ivor’s combined modest wealth barely moves the progress bar. What Gamble lacks in economic liquidity he makes up in musical talent. He produces his finest busking hat and strikes a lively tune. It sounds a lot like Max’s varsity fight song, so Maximilian Heap Madeuppington IV empties his generational pocket change into the hat. Gamble funds the project to completion.

Tanagra leads the party to the next chap.

Giant spider webs left by at least one giant spider cover the corners of this cavern. Ivor warily examines the ceiling, but spots neither giant spider nor giant fly. There appears to be no way out of this room other than the way they came in. A couple of web bridges could, by Tanagra’s reckoning, bear the weight of a laden adventurer across the chasm of unknown depth. Ivor, like his mother, risks it for the biscuit and wobbles over the sticky span carrying a safety rope. Across the chasm he still finds no obvious way out of the dead-end chamber, unless one is willing to skirt a ledge along the chasm. Ivor collects another proverbial biscuit shimmying around the ledge to a more promising area. Gamble follows Ivor’s path but his biscuit slips off the ledge into the chasm. As Gamble’s safety line to Max reels out, Gamble misty steps to Ivor. No big. Tanagra navigates the ledge easily. Max, off sticking his ADHD face into a mummified husk, eventually catches up.

Tanagra leads the party to the next chap.

Crafted walls form an old underground village, quiet and cool. Finally, an easy one.